Time...what is it worth to you?

I ran across an internet meme which caught my attention. It had to do with not being a jackass whisperer. Many people I know have found that as they age, they have less patience for manufactured drama. It's as if the internal bs meter has reset to a low threshold. As I have become older, a lot less gets under my skin. But the things that do really rub me raw. I have developed a lot more patience with children, the elderly, and innocent mistakes. I still try hard to do what I think is right, but I am aware I am not perfect and neither is anyone else. I have very little patience for meanness, self-absorption, and arrogance. Life is short and there is so much beauty and kindness on which to focus. After reaching the half century mark, I just don't have time to waste on things that don't matter. I want to spend the precious commodity of time on being a positive presence in the world and spend my energy on things that matter within my realm of influence. I have become increasing aware of the unimportance of stuff and the importance of how we treat each other. I have become less controlling and more comfortable with uncertainty. I still try to look for the good in others, but I also realize that some people are poisonous and I am better off steering clear of them. I realized that everyone has a different perspective through which they view the world and it is neither better nor worse than mine. It is just different. I am less interested in impressing people and more interested in meaningful connections. I'm not good at evangelism, but I try to do my part by reflecting God's love in such a way that others desire it. I hope at the end of my days to hear the words, "Well done, faithful servant."

So when you are honest with yourself, you realize your days here on Earth are limited. On what and with whom are you willing to spend them?

How much is enough?

These days it seems like nothing is ever enough. We fill our lives with things, with activities, with people, with food, with entertainment, with diagnoses and labels, with complaints. You get the point. We are living in an age of excess and at what cost? Do we ever contemplate what life would be like with less?

Our lives are lived, not in a relaxed state, but one of angst. Many of us feel as though we have never arrived at our final destination. We aren't enjoying the journey, but we are accumulating a lot of baggage. How long do we have to travel with unnecessary burdens before we realize that we, alone, are enough?

I think back to when my first child was old enough to interact with the celebration of Christmas. In an effort to demonstrate my love and adoration for a child I had wanted and worked for so desperately I overspent and made a ridiculous material display of affection. She was too young to really unwrap things by herself, so my husband and I had to do it for her. And you know what? She wasn't nearly as interested in the toys, as she was the boxes and paper that they came in.

Are we like that? Do we search the ads and the stores for the next new gadget or piece of technology only to find a slight bit of disappointment once the box is open and the newness has worn off? Are we like the Grinch realizing that Christmas doesn't come from a store? Are our lives filled with things that don't matter? Are the minutes of our days filled with activities that don't matter? Do we spend our time worrying about people who don't matter? Do we spend our time arguing about things that don't matter?

I am exploring the concept of minimalism. I'm not selling all my stuff and going off to live in a cave. But I am reconsidering my beliefs about stuff, people, activities, power, control, money, food, sleep, energy, balance, consumption, accumulation, grace, forgiveness, gratitude, release, holding on and letting go, needs and wants. I'm beginning to get a lot more selective about the people, places, things, and ideas that I want to keep in my life. I'm uncovering courage that has been buried under fear for a very long time. Fear of not having enough, fear of not being enough, fear of letting go. Letting go is a very freeing experience.

I am contemplating enough. I am putting down the unnecessary burdens and letting go of the limiting beliefs that weigh me down. I am beginning to enjoy the journey and be at home in my own skin. I'm tossing out the guilt and the worry and focusing on the here and now. I'm getting out of the comparison game and just focusing on being present. And that is enough.

Is it right to accept the unfairness of life?

Yesterday I wondered why so many people are angry. Someone today said life is not fair. It's not the first time I've heard it. Heck, I've said it myself. I wonder if that is why so many people are angry. We get stuck in the idea that life should be fair and when it doesn't meet our expectations we get upset. I am stuck wondering if we should accept that life is unfair? If we accept injustice, will we quit opposing it? When do we fight for change and when do we let go of the reigns and just let it be? Anger is a sign that our needs aren't being met. So do we demand change or change our expectations?It's a fine balancing act. Anger can be productive and it can be destructive. I just don't know.

I wonder why so many people are angry. I wonder why so many people are looking for people to blame for the sorry state of their own lives. I think we are responsible for ourselves. But I also think we need to take better care of each other. We often rush around like Bulls in a china shop with no regard for each other's feelings. We're all in the same boat. Sometimes it feels like we are rowing in opposite directions. I believe we have an amazing ability within ourselves to heal each other. We need to know we are not alone.

I've always been a thinker, just sometimes not a coherent one. There are lots of things I wonder about and sometimes it gets me in trouble. More than occasionally, I impulsively say or write what's on my mind. Teaching chose me. I say chose me because I believe it is a calling. Things that are important to me are individuality, integrity, compassion, justice and truth. Those are just a few. I am passionate about the people I love and I am stimulated by ideas. I hope to use this blog to explore ideas and stimulate conversation. Welcome to the world inside my head. Sometimes it is a scary place.